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Swallow Everything

I have an unexpected roommate for awhile. I am a good enough person to help someone. I am also a good enough person to know how long I can force my good temper. I am glad that when I say 'Shut-up now', this person feels comfortable enough in my home to find something else to occupy himself with. He can buy more time for that. Plus, Ian buys me coffee. And he brought his remote control fan.

It happened on Sunday, my Alarm Clock went off by itself.
Ian's head snapped toward me.
"What is that," his eyes wide.
"My Alarm Clock," I said puzzled and went to shut it off. It was 3:38 p.m.

On Monday, I was home alone listening to music loud, sweeping the floor. I could hear the phone ring and when I turned down the music, I heard my Alarm Clock going off.
"Hold on," I said into the phone.
And went to shut it off.
It was 5:58 p.m.
"What the hell is the matter with you," I seethed, as I clicked the off button.

It was 9:23 p.m. when the Alarm Clock screeched it's sound again.
And that was it. I could not take it anymore.
I unplugged the fucking thing.

So, Ian's Alarm Clock took over the next day and went off at 3:16 p.m.
I just stood in the middle of my kitchen it utter disbelief.
I started to get creeped out.
Then I thought it was a conspiracy.
"Fucking Ian," I muttered as I went and unplugged his alarm clock, too.

I heard the sound and tried to fit it in my dream, but it did not work. My eyes snapped open and I looked at my plugged back in Alarm Clock. 4:44 a.m.
But the sound was not coming from the Alarm Clock.
It was my Smoke Detectors.

Ian and I met in the hallway.
Just as the loud beeping stopped.
"What the hell," I said.
Ian shrugged and the Smoke Detectors went off again.
So, Ian and I looked everywhere for fire and than smoke, as the Smoke Detectors continued in it's off and then on again ways.
I even made Ian check the breakers.
He was the last one to screw with them.

After about five minutes, the Smoke Detectors gave up.
Ian and I sat on the couch for five minutes more, before going back to our bedrooms.
And I was laying comfortable in mine.
When I figured it out.
Sometimes, I am slow.
The Voice.
He has been doing this.
Making things make loud noises in my house.
You see, The Voice has been awful quiet lately.
And I have had to Swallow Everything I have wanted to say to him, too.
We do not need Ian thinking I am crazy.

Comments

Esther said…
darn! I hate when that happens!
It's one thing when the alarm goes off at odd hours, it's another when it doesn't go off at all!!
Friday, 3 September 2004 at 06:33:00 GMT-4
Phoesable said…
After my grandma died, my alarm clock used to go on spontaneously with a frighteningly high correlation to acute pangs of missing her.
Friday, 3 September 2004 at 12:53:00 GMT-4
~Jessie said…
That was freakin' hilarious! Our alarm clock only wakes me up when I don't have to get up early that day. Otherwise, I sleep right through it. I've tried having multiple alarms, in various parts of the room (so that I would have to get out of bed to shut them off), ones that get increasingly louder the alarms goes -- all to no avail. If I lived alone while employed, I'd be completely screwed.
Friday, 3 September 2004 at 20:23:00 GMT-4
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