Acceptable Forms Of Revenge

8 Months Old

There she was sitting in her silly looking yellow and green bouncing thing that had taken over the good old fashioned Jolly Jumper. The large circle thing took up so much space in my small living room; I was always stubbing my toe on it.
And there she was, my beautiful daughter grinning and bouncing and babbling...
"Mom, mom, mom."
After she had been up all night long.
Keeping me awake. All night long.
That is when I noticed a small blue squirt gun sitting beside the couch, left behind by a cousin.
So, I went and filled it up.

For the rest of the day, when my daughter's smile got to be too much for me too handle-I would squirt water at her. I would do this with amazing sneakiness.
She would be all smiles and then wet.
She would stop smiling. Her face would pucker up into a frown and she would let out two short cries before narrowing her eyes and looking around.
She would even look at me.
I would just pretended I was watching the TV.
It was so much fun, I continued the game the very next day.
I got sloppy.
And caught.
She laughed at me, smiling wide and proud of herself.