I guess when I was two years old, I used to kiss my Aunt Sue's butt. Because she told me too.
I have no doubts I did.
I discovered at five years old, there was nothing better then my Aunt Sue, though. One night she gave me a party pooper perm and did my face all up with make-up. It was close to midnight before she was done dressing me up in my Grandmother's kitchen.
My eyes were glazed as I looked in the mirror, trying to see myself. The perm was gone by morning. She told me I could keep the shirt she had lent me. I wore it every time I got to spend the night at her house.
I thought it said 'I stop at all salons'.
On a later day, I learned it said 'saloons'. I was still five, so the adults pretty much laughed at me.
I remember looking the word up in the dictionary.
I was six years old when I learned Aunt Sue could burp the entire alphabet. On demand.
That was the year when she started giving me the finger too, just like she did with everyone else. Even Grandma.
She would let me give the finger anytime I wanted to when we were alone. Then she would try to con me into giving my Grandma the finger.
She listened to Boy George and Cyndi Lauper.
So did I.
I watched her torture flies by pulling off their wings one day. She was at work, behind the counter at Canadian Tire, bored out of her tree. I was seven years old.
She also taught me at seven years old how to do shots. With Diet Pepsi. So, my party trick mostly has to do with speed.
When I was eight years old, Aunt Sue made lazy-man cabbage rolls at her house. It is the only kind I still make.
Aunt Sue could shoot hoops pretty good. I was nine when she taught me how to. She would tell stories of how when I was in high school someday, I would see giant posters floor to ceiling of her in the gymnasium. The students still had to sing songs about her, she would say. I would have to one day, too. And then she would dance around.
Aunt Sue danced a lot. About everything.
Aunt Sue was always 27 years old when I was growing-up. If anyone asked that is what I would say. I do not know why. She just struck me as always being that age.
I still remember telling people she was 27 when I was 14 years old.
And I could not wait until I was there someday.
She was my hero.
I have no doubts I did.
I discovered at five years old, there was nothing better then my Aunt Sue, though. One night she gave me a party pooper perm and did my face all up with make-up. It was close to midnight before she was done dressing me up in my Grandmother's kitchen.
My eyes were glazed as I looked in the mirror, trying to see myself. The perm was gone by morning. She told me I could keep the shirt she had lent me. I wore it every time I got to spend the night at her house.
I thought it said 'I stop at all salons'.
On a later day, I learned it said 'saloons'. I was still five, so the adults pretty much laughed at me.
I remember looking the word up in the dictionary.
I was six years old when I learned Aunt Sue could burp the entire alphabet. On demand.
That was the year when she started giving me the finger too, just like she did with everyone else. Even Grandma.
She would let me give the finger anytime I wanted to when we were alone. Then she would try to con me into giving my Grandma the finger.
She listened to Boy George and Cyndi Lauper.
So did I.
I watched her torture flies by pulling off their wings one day. She was at work, behind the counter at Canadian Tire, bored out of her tree. I was seven years old.
She also taught me at seven years old how to do shots. With Diet Pepsi. So, my party trick mostly has to do with speed.
When I was eight years old, Aunt Sue made lazy-man cabbage rolls at her house. It is the only kind I still make.
Aunt Sue could shoot hoops pretty good. I was nine when she taught me how to. She would tell stories of how when I was in high school someday, I would see giant posters floor to ceiling of her in the gymnasium. The students still had to sing songs about her, she would say. I would have to one day, too. And then she would dance around.
Aunt Sue danced a lot. About everything.
Aunt Sue was always 27 years old when I was growing-up. If anyone asked that is what I would say. I do not know why. She just struck me as always being that age.
I still remember telling people she was 27 when I was 14 years old.
And I could not wait until I was there someday.
She was my hero.
Comments
And oh...I just saw Aunt Sue. She asked me to give you this...
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............./´¯/'...'/´¯¯`·¸
........../'/.../..../......./¨¯\
........('(...´...´.... ¯~/'...')
.........\.................'...../
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............\..............(
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*LOL*
Men are weird.
Q
Q